It’s such a beautiful day, the sun is out, the grass is green, there is a slight breeze that makes the heat go away. And I just don’t want to get out of bed. My only day off and I don’t care how wonderful the world is today. I want the day to turn into night so I can go back to sleep. My window is open with the sun shining through, the breeze drifting through my room, with my puppy napping at the end of my bed. I can just hear the birds chattering to one another, while every so often a smell of home cooked food wafts through the air. A car might drive by, or a dog might bark, the school children outside laugh and chase each other, but I still don’t want to be part of that. I would rather stay in my bed and have a moody day.
My head aches, my back spasms, and every so often my eyes tear up for no reason at all. I am having one of those days. The day where I am grieving, but I am also tired, sore and over life. I can see clouds in the distance, as they come closer to ruin the beautiful Spring day, I know that is more my mood, I am ready to ruin the perfect day for everyone else with just the wind blowing me in the right direction.
Missing Ryker on perfect days is the worst, because I can picture what my life would be like on these days, I can see clearly how my life would have been.