My normal life began, and I am still living, I haven’t dug myself in a whole and strayed away from the world. I accepted my fate and I am here. I work everyday, I even got promoted to Head Chef already. My life has moved forward. Through all the pain, through the heart ache, I learnt to live again. And I can say I am proud of myself.
Tim and I have a stable relationship again, we have stuck together through the hardest time yet and we are stronger for it, we are one again. We aren’t blaming one another, we aren’t angry at each other, we are kind of happy again. Nothing like before, but we are getting there. We have our moments when one of us has a bad day, but you know what? We are there for each other, we pull the other out of that ditch, and dust each other off. And we are getting our life back on track.
Not all relationships end when a child dies, I was once told that the death of our son is what would either make us or break us, and you know what, I think your relationship is what you want it to be. The death of a child will tear you apart at times, the pain will make you hate each other, it will make you want to stop fighting for each other, but if you stop fighting, you lose each other. I know that the pain consumes each of you, I know that the thought of anything other than your child makes you angry, but you need to remember that, that person you love feels that way too.
They feel the loss, they hate themselves just as much as you hate yourself, they might even want life to stop for a little while, but be patient. Don’t start a fight because you don’t know how to communicate anymore, don’t push the other away, and if you are the one being pushed away, just be patient.
Love is not easy, and when you have to deal with the death of a child, it makes it a lot harder. But hold on to one another. They are the ones going through the same journey as you, they know your story because it is their story too.